Ok, so........I've learned an amazing amount of things over the years.......I've lost & won........mostly lost.......but, I've won something huge from this journey I've been on and that is knowledge and knowledge is power!
I will begin my story after high school.........
I got into alot of trouble and could not find the way out, went back and forth and kept falling through the cracks.....I worked hard and played harder.....I tried going to college which I don't regret but, feel it was a waste of money since I had already know everything I was taught, was the top of my class and still got no degree because my school was not accredited to give associates degree's out and I could not afford to go to Boston to finish after spending $30,000.........got out of school and got into some more trouble......but, then I met my wonderful husband, was doing great for a while enjoying ourselves, doing whatever we wanted, had great jobs......and then my grandmother died, now a little background, I've lost MANY family members along the way, death became numbing to me.......after my grandmother died, someone needed to care for grandpa......my father took him to his home with my mother & brother......but, my father had an alcohol problem that was horrible for many years (a whole other story) and he couldn't do it alone anymore so he called on Scott and me for help........then my father got worse......and grandpa was getting worse......so we moved grandpa back into his home and took full legal guardianship of him, taking power of attorney away from my father.........then Feb. 28, 2004 came along, the day they found my father dead..................I went into shock, could not control myself.......and began doing everything to damage my own life and bring everyone I loved down with me........I lost my best friend, my hero, he was 53 years old...........how was I suppose to live.........I couldn't control myself and I began drinking more and more, driving all over the place.......I got two DUI's and they both were not pretty and they were basically back to back.........grandpa was running out of money at the time and I had just found out I could not have children.........I wanted to run my car into a brick wall.........everything shattered around me, I cared for no one including myself........
I then snapped out of it meetings, probation, interlock machine, losing my license, thousands of dollars in fines over $15,000, how could I turn back now, I could only go forward and get help..........I had to take care of my grandfather, he needed me........
Taking care of grandpa was a huge task, everyday was something new and I learned something new everyday......it's amazing the way this country works, many things disgust me......many people disgust me.......during this whole time I was being told what to do by my horrible aunt who lived 500 miles away........who never came to help with her FATHER, my grandfather.........to be continued
No comments:
Post a Comment